American President Barack Hussein Obama, faced with enormous problems just before the midterm elections such as Ebola, I.S.I.S., Ebola, Iran, Ebola, Benghazi, Ebola, immigration, Ebola, Russia, Ebola, the V.A., Ebola and Ebola... has reacted with a firm hand and announced that the biggest problem facing the nation today is global warming and he is totally committed and determined to defeat it.
Gosh... do you sometimes get the feeling, as I do, that he needs to have his tree examined? Well, I decided to do something about it and started calling tree experts yesterday. I managed to call 114 tree experts across the country and they all categorically refused to take the job. "Some cases are just totally untreatable," lamented one tree expert from Iowa. "I'd rather clean my navel than tackle this problem."
I hear through the Washington grapevine that Obama is going to ask Congress for $1 trillion to deal with global warming. He plans to immediately send 3,000 troops to Iceland's Holuhraun Volcano to take care of that imminent threat to global warming. He's also naming a new Global Warming Czar, Alphonso Gore, to coordinate activities. "Until we defeat global warming, nothing else in the world today can be solved," Obama asserted from the 12th green at Augusta National Golf Course. "I don't care if we have to spend $2 trillion or even $5 trillion, we simply have to win this war." He then proceeded to sink a 15 inch putt and gave his caddie, Tiger Woods, a high-five, then marking down an eight for the par-three hole.
I've finally decided that the entire Obama Presidency can be summed up in one word: ludicrous. Just ludicrous.
That's MY AMERICAN OPINION, respectfully submitted.
No comments:
Post a Comment