Saturday, December 06, 2008

WHAT DETROIT NEEDS IS "THE SHAFT"


I was born in 1942 and never paid attention to many of the really important things in life until I was in my 30’s. Imagine my surprise to find out that Bill Gates invented the abacus before he invented the computer, for example. That’s why he has beady eyes, I suppose.

Hoover invented the vacuum cleaner before he started the F.B.I.? Dell published comic books before getting into the computer business? (Now, that one should have been obvious…..) God invented the laptop? Bob Dole invented the pineapple? McDonald’s did NOT invent the hamburger? (No, the guy that invented the pork barrels did….what was his name…..?) Oldsmobile used to be its own company before General Motors bought it and eventually shut it down? Jeep was once Jeep, then a Willis Jeep, then an American Motors Jeep? Plymouth was not a rock? And, there was actually a car named after Rock Hudson? (I doubt that there was ever a car named the Hewlett, although there IS a company called Hewlett-Packard and there WAS a car called the Packard.)

Given, Chevrolet is as American as apple pie and we Americans do love our apple pie, hot dogs and beer. And, so it is that we Americans don’t want to see the Detroit automobile industry go the way of U.S. Steel and dozens of other manufacturing industries that no longer operate in this country. The argument naturally arises that we just simply cannot allow the Big Three to dwindle and die, or to declare bankruptcy for that matter. After all, in the eyes of our parents bankruptcy is failure in more ways than one. Besides, if Chevrolet goes, what is going to replace apple pie? Sushi?

Nevertheless, we need to set sentiment and misty eyes aside for the moment and to examine the facts. The facts are that we have allowed greed to become the basis for our stupidity. Back in Las Vegas in the 1970’s, one of my neighbors bought a new pickup. His buddy down the street bought a bigger pickup and put a camper on it. The first guy simply could not be outdone by that, so he bought a motor home, (one of those little ones with a sleeper over the cab). Oblivious to what was going on, I came home one day with a big motor home and both of my neighbors moved out.

That’s what we’re talking about here.

The employees of the Big Three make far more money than any of their foreign-based competitors pay, (including Toyota which has a plant in the United States). The employees of the Big Three have terrific benefits. The executives who run the Big Three are making enormous salaries, benefits and perks. Most in that industry live in fancy, comparatively high-priced homes and drive nice cars. Some have summer cottages, and the story goes on. Simply put, those working for or managing the Big Three or one of their suppliers are enjoying a standard of living above the national average America, and above that of Toyota employees.

Yes, they’ve gotten used to it. Managing execs of the Big Three saw absolutely nothing wrong with jumping into their plush corporate jets and flying off to Washington to ask for a handout. They didn’t even share a plane! What’s more, their unions supported them in their efforts!

Come on, everyone! Open your eyes! Detroit can no longer compete with Toyota because Detroit has managed to price itself out of the race! Either the government has to mandate that Toyota and other foreign car makers jack up their costs, or they have to change the way Detroit thinks and operates. Otherwise, GM, Ford, and Chrysler will join the likes of U.S. Steel. Everyone who has looked at the situation knows this to be true.

Furthermore, WHAT RIGHT DOES BARNEY FRANK OR NANCY PELOSI OR HARRY REID HAVE TO THROW $34 BILLION OUT THERE TO SAVE DETROIT AUTOWORKERS WHILE, AT THE SAME TIME, TO SHRUG THEIR COLLECTIVE SHOULDERS AT THE 500,000 PEOPLE WHO BECAME UNEMPLOYED LAST MONTH? HOW MUCH MORE OF THIS CONGRESSIONAL “GIVE” TO THE BIG FINANCIAL GUYS, THE AIG’S AND DETROITS OF THE WORLD WHO DESERVE WHATEVER THE RAMIFICATIONS ARE FROM WHAT THEY CREATED, while we average Americans get nothing but the resulting pain and suffering….HOW MUCH MORE BEFORE WE WISE UP?

Here’s the nature of the quandary: The big boys in Detroit will lose one helluva lot of face if they file bankruptcy. Even if filing bankruptcy will allow the Big Three to cut away at excessive labor costs, high-priced contracts with suppliers, and management benefits and perks, (thereby streamlining their operations and becoming more efficient “Lean and mean” machines who are competitive in the market place,) no one at the helm wants to be the one to steer the ship away from the fat, big-time standards of living they have all been enjoying.

In Washington, our illustrious leaders who presided over the national housing debacle have jumped to the rescue with bags full of our money shouting “apple pie, apple pie, apple pie!” Their persuading argument is that with the highest layoffs in 34 years, we simply can’t afford to let the Big Three go down. We HAVE to throw more money at the problem. Save the jobs, right? NO politician wants to prevail over another national failure, so they figure the only realistic answer for them is to throw more money at the problem, regardless of which pot it comes from, (like, who needs to green up the auto industry anyway?).

Does that mean that we Americans allow Congress to throw $34 billion at Detroit and the execs and unions and suppliers to continue to make themselves money when they can’t compete with Toyota? That, my friends, is the crux of the argument; all we would be accomplishing is postponing the inevitable.

On the other hand, we could simply allow them to close their doors tomorrow and to go the way of U.S. Steel.

Or, we can force the issue by putting on a big dog and pony show. If we Americans would take just an hour to get off of our potato-couch asses and fire off a letter or email or fax or phone call to Washington demanding NO bailout, that would solve the problem, big-time. Congress can say that they were getting too much political heat from the “dumb” citizens and thereby refuse the bailouts. Detroit could cry that Congress wouldn’t give them the money and that they had no choice but to file for reorganization under the bankruptcy acts. The union leaders could cry that they had no say-so in all of this. The suppliers could cry that the cutbacks of the automakers were forcing them to “lean up” as well.

And, given proper oversight by the courts, leaving Congress out of the equation, Detroit should be through this crisis within the next five years, by which time we hope that the national economy will have recovered enough from what Congress has already done to us that Americans can afford to buy cars again and Detroit will now be competitive and giving Toyota and other foreign-based car makers a good “run for their money.”

To me, this course of action is a “no-brainer.” Congress, Detroit, the unions, the suppliers can all pass the blame to us, the “dumb American citizens,” and the American auto-making industry will be saved, jobs will be protected, and we can all get back to enjoying our apple pie which, in my opinion, tastes far better than sushi.

Otherwise, they should all fold up their Hummers and get out of Dodge while the gettin’s good.

That’s MY AMERICAN OPINION, respectfully submitted.

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